Forgiveness
and the costs of unforgiveness
There are more preachers in hell today over forgiveness issues than for probably
any other cause. In the DVD entitled the Lazarus Phenonemon
an African preacher died in a car wreck. He was taken to Heaven and shown
what heaven was like. He was then taken to hell and shown what hell was like. He
was told it was not yet his time, but if it were, hell was where he would end up
because he had a severe forgiveness issue with his wife when he died. He saw
other preachers he had known in hell and discovered that forgiveness issues were
why they were there. He was resurrected back to life almost three days after his
death. Miracles still happen today.
If you ever talk to someone involved in
Deliverance ministry
they will tell you that the most common cause of severe "demonic"
problems in a person's life is "UNFORGIVENESS". Clinging on to
bitterness or grudges is virtually the singlemost dangerous spiritual
thing that a person can do. It can even cause physical sickness.
And yet it is so common - even in the church! Below is a great
article on this topic by Rodney Francis:
UNFORGIVENESS - A CAUSE of MAJOR BONDAGE -by Rodney W. Francis.
It has been said that the major cause of hindrances and bondages
in the lives of Christians is that of unforgiveness. Every one of us
will have experienced things in our lives, disagreements, criticisms,
accusations (both true and false) against us. We cannot avoid
these things happening. Even Jesus said that it was "impossible
but that offences would come" (Luke 17:1). Offences are "stumbling
blocks" which come against us ~ things said and done to us to put
us down, or to try and subject us to someone else's will, etc. So,
no matter how well we handle relationships, etc., we will all face
negative things being thrown at us. Some will "attack" us if for no
other reason but that they are jealous of us.
For the Christian we must accept that these things will happen in our lives.
· The big issue is how we
deal with them!
It is very important to realize that once the offence has taken place,
that we cannot change that. What we can change is our response
to it, and how we allow it to affect us. The sooner we can take
these matters to the Lord and leave them with Him ~ and at the
same time practice forgiveness toward those who have offended us ~
the sooner we will be able to get on with our lives and continue to
be fruitful in His service. But if we allow those criticisms to get into
our emotions and cause us to re-act negatively and to start "bad
mouthing" that person who has offended (and hurt) us, then it will
quickly get into our spirit and lodge there. Once that happens, then
we become the loser in the situation ~ even if the accusations are
wrong! It is so important that we learn to keep short accounts with
God and with people; otherwise we will start on a downward
slippery slope that can cause us to finish up being hurt, angry,
resentful, "bitter and twisted", carrying a wounded spirit in the
process. None of us can afford to let that happen. Yet, in my
travels in numbers of countries, I am finding wounded Christians
that have to be set free...
It is sad, but true, that many who have a prophetic calling in God
have been "put down" or prevented from functioning. This has
caused many to be "shut down," be hurt and to go inwards, which
does not allow them to pursue and fulfil their calling. Tragically,
many Christian Leaders have been guilty of clamping down on
those who are trying to exercise their Spiritual Gifts. Regardless of
who caused the offence we all need to practice forgiveness. Let me
emphasize strongly to you: carrying unforgiveness in your heart is
not worth it! There is nothing good or justifiable in our carrying
unforgiveness. If you have any unforgiveness in your heart and life
right now, let me encourage you to make it a top priority to deal
with it, and to get rid of it. Take it to JESUS ~ give it to Him, as He
is the only One who can take it away from us. It is He that we are
called to please; and our carrying unforgiveness does not please
Him at all. In fact unforgiveness stops God from forgiving us of our
many offences against Him (Matthew 6:14-15)! Right now, come
before the Lord Jesus and give it all to Him
Repentance
and forgiveness are very important issues for salvation. Without repentance
there is no salvation. Jesus said in Luke 13:3: “I
tell you, Nay: but, except ye repent, ye shall all likewise perish”.
However our sins can not be forgiven, if we will not forgive others: “For
if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive
your trespasses” (Mat.6:14-15). That is a very key point of Jesus’
teachings: do to others what you want them to do to you. You reap what you sow.
If you can’t forgive others, God cannot forgive you. If you do not do good for
others, God will not do good for you.
When
Jesus cured somebody’s disease He forgave the sins of that sick person (Mat.
9:2). That was the cure. That means when God forgives, a person can get well if
it is not his appointed time to die.
Jesus
told a proverb about a king and his servant (Mat. 18:23-35). The servant owed to
the king 10000 talents and because the servant couldn’t pay the debt the king
commanded to sell the servant together with his wife and children. The servant
fell on his knees and asked the king for forgiveness. The king forgave the
servant. However when the servant came home, he found his fellow who owed to him
100 pence (a much lessor debt), and demanded him to pay the debt. When the poor
fellow couldn’t pay, the servant beat him and put him into jail. When the king
found out about it, he called the servant and said unto him: “ O thou wicked
servant, I forgave thee all that debt, Shouldest not thou also have had
compassion on thy fellow servant, even as I had pity on thee?” Then the king
delivered him to the tormentors, till he will pay all the debt. So, Jesus said,
likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if you from your
hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.
Therefore
we need to forgive always. Not sometimes, no often, but ALWAYS; EVERYTIME. That
does not meanwe have to be passive and suffer all the evil attempts of evil
persons, and do nothing against the actions of that person. No. Jesus Himself
didn’t tolerate the wicked actions of the Pharisees, and spoke with them in
very strong words. We remember what Jesus did when He saw the merchants making a
fleamarket and bartering in the God’s temple. Passiveness and forgiveness are
not the same. We can show that we are against evil actions but we never can have
in our hearts evil against those people, who do evil to us. We have to forgive
them in our hearts. We have to defeat evil by kindness. If you think those
people cannot be saved, feel sorry for them for they will be tortured in hell
for all the evil they have done. If you have hope that they can be saved, try
your best to save them with patience, forgiveness and love. But regardless of
what you think about the possibility of salvation for those people, you need to
forgive them if your own salvation means anything to you.
How
do we know if we have un-forgiveness in our hearts?
- if we feel angry much of the time;
- if we avoid certain people;
- if we have a lot of negative memories;
- if we have secretly wished that some people would die;
-
if we think how to get even with a person who has offended us.
This
are the fruits of unforgiveness.
Why
is un-forgiveness a sin? Because
- it is a barrier between you and God;
- as every other sin it damages you;
- and it damages others.
Forgiveness
is crucifying our instincts to seek revenge. By raising God above our sinful
nature, we are raising ourselves from the animal level, when our instincts
demand us to hurt back, to the level of perfection in God, to the level of
God’s children.
“Judge
not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned:
forgive, and ye shall be forgiven: Give, and it shall be given unto you; good
measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give
into your bosom. For with the same measure that you mete out it shall be
measured to you again” (Luke 6:37-38)
Naturally
every one of us wants revenge for wrong suffering, but if we believe in the Word
of God, in His promise, we can be sure that God will deal with those people. He
will judge. “It is Me to revenge; I will repay, says
the Lord” (Rom.12:19).
Forgiveness
has taken place when we sincerely wish good to someone who offended us before,
when we talk about that person without hard feelings.
Forgiveness releases us from bondage and hatred or being in an unhealthy
emotional connection to those who have harmed us.
Without
the ability to forgive our sinful nature will create a protective structure in
our character, the structure which will protect us from being hurt again. This
structure is called self-judgment. It is judgment of others and yourself.
Judgment
of others. Sometimes we can forgive
some people’s actions against us, but because of those actions we still can be
under the influence of the negative thoughts about those people. We begin to
judge by thinking about those people as rude, stupid, ignorant, rough,
malicious, and liars. Your condemning judgment will result in anger and hatred.
Therefore it is important to forgive not only evil action against you, but
completely the people who did it to you, for all past and future evil actions
against you.
Judgment
of yourself. If you can’t forgive others, you will think that others hate you.
That you are worthless, nobody loves you. Your condemning judgment of self will
result in low self-image, feelings of insecurity, worries and depression.
Whenever someone will care about you, you will suspect him of insincerity. You
will never believe that someone can love you.
We
are not perfect and it is always easier for us to see somebody’s else fault
than our own. Jesus said (Mat.7:1-2): Do not judge or
you too will be judged, for with what judgment you judge, you shall be judged:
and with what measure you mete, it shall be measured to you”. This
means we will bring unto ourselves harm in the same areas of life in which we
have made judgments against others.
If
you are victim of somebody’s abuse and not able to stop the abuse and are not
able to forgive the abusers you will fall into the trap that an unforgiving evil
spirit will make you believe that you are a saint. Now you will think: “I’m
an innocent lamb. They hurt me, and I do not hurt them in return. Instead I’m
trying to do good for them. They are bad, I’m good. God needs to punish them
for what they have done to me”.
So
you are pursuing a couple mistakes: you didn’t forgive; you wish bad to your
abusers; you are the Judge and you are trying to make God an executor of your
own little judgment. All these mistakes are fatal.
You
fail to realize that you are not the only victim. You don’t see that you are
hurting others and giving them uneasy feelings also.
An
unforgiving evil spirit can take you to the point when you will want to take
your own life. Your motif will be like this: “I’m so worthless, nobody love
me, I always in the way of others. God, see I’m an innocent victim”. Your
secret thought will be: “I will make them feel bad for what they done to me!
They will feel guilty for my death for the rest of their lives. Then they will
realize that I was important to them. God will punish them for my death”.
So
we see unforgiveness opens the door to your soul for evil spirits of revenge,
self-judgment, suicide, the spirits
which will masquerade as psychological problems, problems in relationships with
other people and with yourself. Our judgment leads to the destruction of ourselves and of
others, God’s judgment leads to the truth.
Every
victim of abuse, in order to find the way to happiness in relationships with
other people, to clear one’s consciousness
has to stop cursing him/herself and others, forgive others and seek help
in the body of Christ.
Jesus
knew what it meant to be abused, to be rejected and hated, but He said: “Love
your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate
you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
That you may be the children of Our Father which is in heaven: for he makes His
sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and
unjust. For if you love them which love you, what reward have you? Do not even
the tax collectors the same?” (Mat.5:44-46)
Love,
bless, do good and pray. These are key words of forgiveness. The first steps to
forgive people are not judging others as well as
themselves but understanding their actions.
A
victim of an unforgiving spirit needs to realize how unforgiveness is destroying
his/her life and and the lives of those around him.. Unforgiveness is a great
sin which can lead to hell on earth as well as tortures after death.
Jesus
– our Creator God who was crucified by dirty men had plead: “Father,
forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing!” , He forgave
those who had nailed His hands and feet to the cross, and those who cursed Him
and spit upon Him.
God
the Father – Creator of all – The Highest One in the universe – let His
only Son be tortured by the hands of the dirtiest of His creation. And He
forgave them. He forgave them all who forgave others and with a sincere heart
asked God for forgiveness.
We
also have to bless our enemies, do good for them, pray for them and wish good
for them. So we will be worthy of His forgiveness, and His gift of eternal life
by the promise and in the name of Jesus, our Messiah.
Brothers
and sisters, if you do not already have a forgiving spirit, pray to Jesus to
give you one so that an evil unforgiving demonic spirit may not overtake you and
enter you.
Forgiveness is a big issue in both staying out of hell and entering the realm of
the heavenly kingdom.
May
you have a great Sabbath. That’s my message for today.
_______________________________
Seven Fruits Of Forgiving
by
Rev. James DeBraux, Sr
Rev. John PO Box 158
Newtonville, NJ 08346 USA
1.
I know some of you in here have been estranged with someone at one time or
another.Then you decided to ask that person forgiveness. How was your feeling at
the time you asked? Pretty scary, wasn't it? But how did you feel after you
asked? Much better, right? AAAH! Indeed you did! But being forgiven is much more
than just feeling good.
2. I want to talk to you from the bible. I want
to talk about the fruits of forgiving and forgiveness. The benefits of forgiving
and forgiveness. The results of being forgiving and forgiven by others. The
fruits of forgiveness is like going to a Hawaiian Luau. The Banquet Tables are
full of good fruits. There are so many things we can say that are fruits of
forgiveness.
3. But right now I want to look at seven, YES,
just seven fruits of forgiveness. Now it may be a benefit to you to write
these down. because, dear friends, if you have anything against another
person or someone else has something against you, you get that right between
you, AMEN! These seven fruits will be fruits in your life as well. Let's see
what the Bible has to say about the Seven Fruits of Forgiveness. First of all
one of the Great Fruits of Forgiveness is Reconciliation. Now, you have been
angry with someone, perhaps someone dear to you...
4. Remember by seeking and granting forgiveness
you can become reconciled with that person. Now what does it mean to be
reconciled? Simply this. To be reconciled means to be at peace with. You see
sighing a peace treaty isn't enough. Only forgiveness heals a wounded
relationship. Just because you and your pastor, ushers, or Deacons and
members of the same church or sons or daughters, wife and husband living in the
same home have a semi - peace treaty, does not mean you have peace in your home.
You have to have reconciliation and reconciliation comes through forgiving. When
you forgive is when you are forgiven.
5- Remember Jesus words in Matthew Chapter 18
verse 15 "If thy brother sins against you, go and tell his fault
between you and him alone; If he hears you, you have gained your brother."
Now think about that statement for a moment. If your brother hears you that
means he recognizes his sins and repents , if your brother hears you and repents
of it.. You have reconciled with your brother/sister, you have gained your
brother/sister. Now, does that mean you have lost your brother/sister if no
reconciliation takes place? Yes it does. OOH.. He or she will still be
your brother/sister, but he/she will be a stranger until peace replaces
hostility.
6-Just as you have been reconciled with God by
the blood of Jesus Christ, be reconciled with that person with whom you are
estranged. Make peace through forgiveness. The First Fruit of Forgiveness
is Reconciliation. Well, the Second Fruit of Forgiveness is to Right our
relationship with the Lord Jesus. You see when our relationship to others is not
right, when its wrong, our relationship with God is also not right. John
included this problem in his first epistle. (First John chapter 4 verse 20).
Here, John asks a question ..
7- If someone says I love God and hates his
brother/sister, he is a liar; For he that loveth not his brother/sister, whom he
have seen, how can he love God who he has not seen? That is a good question!
Getting into a right relationship with others may be a fruit with a right
relationship with God. But frequently the streak runs the other direction. We
must right our relationship with others to be in a right relationship with God.
That means seeking or granting forgiveness.
8. Friends, one of our great fruits of
forgiveness is getting our relationship right. One of our great fruit of
forgiveness is Reconciliation. But another one is getting our relationship right
with the Lord, knowing that we are in a right relationship with others.
Therefore we are in a right relationship with him.
9. Now, let's look at a third fruit. For me one
of my excellent benefits of forgiving is my Prayer life. Jesus teaches us a very
important lesson about this in Mark chapter eleven- right after those great
verses about having faith, about moving mountains, Jesus said "and whenever
you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone,
Forgive Them, that your father in heaven may forgive you your trespass. (verse
25) Now do you see the relationship there. If you are praying, stop, seek or
grant forgiveness first, then go back to your prayer. I think its important that
we recognize Jesus, that he tells us to do this.
10. Jesus is saying that while you are praying
and you realize you have a problem with another believer, or that they have a
problem with you. Your responsibility is to stop praying and seek or grant
forgiveness, which ever is appropriate and then come back to your praying. Now,
why is that? Why is it so important that I seek and grant forgiveness before I
pray? The answer: So God will hear my prayer.
11. You see, harboring an unforgiving spirit or
not asking someone to forgive us, IS SIN. The bible reminds us if I regard
iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me. PSALMS 66 verse 18. So a
third fruit of forgiveness is the Fruit of a Prayer Life. So you see, you cannot
have much of a prayer life if you are not a forgiving person. To summarize, The
Seven Fruits of forgiveness thus far consist of the First Fruit which is
Reconciliation, The Second Fruit is we must right our Relationship with the
Lord. The Third Fruit is that we have a fruitful Prayer Life.
12. Now what about number 4. The Fourth Fruit of
Forgiveness is Removing Bitterness From Our Lives. You see there is an
undeniable link between a bitter spirit and a spirit of unforgiveness. The more
bitter a person becomes, the less likely they are to forgive. Here are the words
of the apostle Paul "Do not grieve the holy Spirit of God, by whom you are
sealed unto the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and
clamor,and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind
one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's
sake hath forgiven you." That is in Ephesians chapter 4 verse 30, 31, 32.
Now did you notice the contrast in these verses? In one verse he said to put
away bitterness, wrath, anger and so on. In the next verse he said be kind to
one another, tender hearted, forgiving one another. You see the first is just
opposite to the second. Fact is we might as well say the first is diametrically
opposed to the second. If you have the first, you won't have the second and if
you practice the second there will be no room for the first.
13. Bitterness and forgiveness are mutual
exclusive and that means if you are not forgiving you are inflicted with
bitterness. But if you truly forgive, you have rooted out that root of
bitterness. Remember it this way, the Fruit of Forgiveness is better than the
root of bitterness. If there is bitterness, anger and wrath in your life, there
cannot be kindness, tenderheartedness and forgiveness in your life, there will
be no bitterness, wrath and anger.
14. Now, just look inside your own soul,
you will see which of these is there. We will now look at the Benefits of
Forgiveness. We have seen four thus far. Reconciliation with another person, a
right Relationship with the Lord, an unhindered Prayer Life and the Rooting out
of Bitterness. Now the fifth Fruit is Being Forgiven. Just could be revival.
Both personal revival and cooperative revival, and we are reconciled to someone
who has wronged us following hard on the heels of that reconciliation could be,
just could be revival to getting right with God and His people.
15. The one sin that is doing more to hold back
the power of God in revival than any other is a unforgiving spirit. I know
that is right . Satan knows its the little foxes that spoil the vines. Sometimes
a great movement of God in a local assembly, a great revival in a local church
may be fortis (dull or dry) simply by just two people who are unforgiving toward
each other. Isn't that exactly why Paul addresses the disagreement between
Euodia and Syntyche in the book of Philippians chapter 4. Revival in that church
was just too important to let two unforgiving women spoil it for everyone. When
we forgive one another the same way God forgives us, it will not bring revival
to the church, it will be revival in the church.
16. The sixth great reason for forgiving
one another is to insure that God has forgiven us. Remember Jesus words in the
Lord's Prayer Matthew chapter 6 "Forgive us our debts, as we forgive
our debtors.' That means either forgive us in the same way we forgive
others or forgive us to the same extent we forgive others. Either way if
we are not going to forgive, we are not going to be forgiven. Jesus continues
immediately after that prayer and says for if you forgive men for their
trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not
forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
17. Now let's see? Is this understandable? Is
this verse open to a dozen different interpretations? I do not think so. Friends
that's pretty plain. Those are stern words from our Lord and indicate one of the
Fruits of Forgiveness is to know we have been forgiven by God. That in itself is
enough to make us want to be forgiven. Well, we are considering Seven Fruits of
Forgiveness and to me this last one is the best. Fruit number Seven is the Benefit
of Being Forgiven or Forgiving; Is A Clear Conscience. You see
Christianity is a religion of the conscience.
18. Once we are convicted with wrong, we will be
miserable until we make that wrong right. In fact, the indwelling of the Holy
Ghost will see to it. That is what his convicting power is all about in the life
of a believer. Titus 1:15 refers to a deviled conscience. If we are unforgiving,
we have such a conscience. However, First Peter 3:16 and First Timothy 1:5
speaks of a good conscience. Now which one would you rather have? Would you
prefer a conscience that thumps like a sore thumb all the time or a conscience
that is smooth free from pain and distress. You can have this last kind of
conscience but only when you are free from offense to God and to others...
19. To be free from offense to God and others you
must be both forgiving and forgiven. That my friends is why FORGIVING
OTHERS is so important.
FORGIVENESS
Repentance and forgiveness are the most important issues for
salvation. Without repentance there is no salvation. Jesus said: “I
tell you, Nay: but, except ye repent, ye shall all likewise perish”
(Luke 13:3). However our sins can not be forgiven, if we will not forgive
others: “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your
heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their
trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses”
(Mat.6:14-15). That is the key point of Jesus’ teachings: do to others what
you what them to do for you. You reap what you had sown. If you can’t forgive
others, God can not forgive you. If you do not do good for others, God will not
do good for you.
Today we will
talk about forgiveness.
When Jesus cured somebody’s disease He forgave sins of that
sick person (Mat. 9:2). That was the cure. That means when God forgives, a
person can get well ( if, of course, it is not his appointed time to die).
So if we will be forgiven, we will get well. That
means, if we will forgive we will get
well.
For our selfish nature it is difficult sometimes to forgive.
If it is easy to forgive a some nice person for something wrong he or she is
done against you unintentionally, but it is very difficult to forgive a some
nasty neighbor who always does something bad to you purposely. We can forgive
such people one or two times and after that our patience with them can
disappear. Apostles knew this feeling therefore they asked, what the limit of
our forgiveness should be: “Then came Peter to him,
and said, Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him?
till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times:
but, Until seventy times seven” (Mat.18:21-22). Thus Jesus said, we
need to forgive always. And He taught us not only forgive our brothers, but our
enemies also.
He told the proverb about a king and his servant (Mat.
18:23-35). The servant owed to the king 10000 talents and because the servant
couldn’t pay the debt the king commanded to sell the servant together with his
wife and children. The servant fell on his knees and asked the king for
forgiveness. The king forgave the servant. However when the servant came home,
he found his fellow who owed to him 100 pence (like coin, which is much smaller
than talent), and demanded him to pay the debt. When the poor fellow couldn’t
pay, the servant beat him and put him into jail. When the king had found out
about it, he called the servant and said unto him: “ O thou wicked servant, I
forgave thee all that debt, Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy
fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?” Then the king delivered him to the
tormentors, till he will pay all the debt. So, Jesus said,
likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your
hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.
Therefore we need to forgive always. That is not mean to be
passive and suffer all the evil attempts of some evil person, and do nothing
against evil actions of that person. No. Jesus by Himself didn’t tolerate the
wicked actions of Pharisees, and spoke with them in very strong words, we
remember what Jesus did when He saw the merchants made fleemarket in the God’s
temple. Passiveness and forgiveness are not the same. We can show that we
against some evil actions but we never can have in our hearts evil against those
people, who do evil to us. We have to forgive them in our hearts. We have to
defeat evil by kindness. If you think those people can not be saved, feel sorry
for them for they will be tortured in hell for all what they done bad. If you
have hope that they can be saved, try your best to save them with patience,
forgiveness and love. But regardless of what you think about the possibility of
salvation for those people, you need to forgive them.
How do we know if we have un-forgiveness in our hearts?
- if we feel angry much of the time;
- if we avoid certain people;
- if we have a lot of negative memories;
- if we have secretly wished that some people would die;
- if we think how to get even with some person who offended
us.
This are the fruits of unforgiveness.
Why is un-forgiveness a sin?
- it is a barrier between you and God;
- as every other sin it damages you;
- and it damages others.
Forgiveness is crucifying our instincts to seek revenge. By
rising God above our sinful nature, we are rising themselves from the animal
level, when our instincts demand us to hurt back, to the level of perfection in
God, to the level of God’s children.
“Judge not, and ye shall not be
judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be
forgiven: Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and
shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the
same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again”
(Luke 6:37-38)
Naturally every one of us want revenge for the wrong
suffering, but if we believe in the Word of God, in His promise, we can be sure
that God will deal with those people. He will judge. “It
is My to revenge; I will repay, says the Lord” (Rom.12:19).
Forgiveness has taken place when we sincerely wish good to
someone who offended us before, when we talk about that person without hard
feelings.
Forgiveness releases us from bondage and hatred or being in unhealthy emotional
connection to those who have harmed us.
Without the ability to forgive our sinful nature will create
a protective structure in our character, the structure which will protect us
from being hurt again. This structure called self-judgment. It is judgment of
others and yourself.
Judgment of
others. Sometimes we can forgive
some people’s actions against us, but because of those actions we still can be
under influence of the negative thoughts about those people. We begin to judge
by thinking about those people as rude, stupid, ignorant, rough, malicious,
liars and ctr. Your condemning judgment will result in anger and hatred.
Therefore it is important to forgive not only evil action against you, but
completely the people who did it to you, for all past and future evil actions
against you.
Judgment of yourself. If you can’t forgive others, you will
think that others hate you. That you are worthless, nobody love you. Your
condemning judgment of self will result in low self-image, feeling of insecure,
worries and depression. Whenever someone will care about you, you will suspect
him in insincerity. You will never believe that someone can love you.
We are so not perfect that it is always much easy for us to
see somebody’s else fault than our own. Jesus said (Mat.7:1-2): Do
not judge or you too will be judged, for with what judgment you judge, you shall
be judged: and with what measure you mete, it shall be measured to you”.
This means we will bring unto ourselves harm in the same areas of life in which
we have made judgments against others.
If you are victim of somebody’s abuse and not able to stop
the abusing of some close people and not able to forgive the abusers you will
come into the trap: unforgiving spirit will make you believe that you are a
saint. Now you will think: “I’m innocent lamb. They hurt me, and I do not
hurt them in my turn. Instead I’m trying to do good for them. They are bad,
I’m good. God needs to punish them for what they have done to me”.
So you are doing a couple mistakes: you didn’t forgive; you
wish bad to your abusers; you are the Judge and you are trying to make God an
executor of your own little judgment. All these mistakes are fatal.
You fail to realize that you are not the only victim. You
don’t see that you are hurting others and give them uneasy feelings also.
Unforgiving evil spirit can take you to the point when you
will want to take your own life. Your motif will be like this: “I’m so
worthless, nobody love me, I always on the way of others. God, see I’m
innocent victim”. Your secret thought will be: “I will make them feel bad
for all what they done to me! They will feel guilty for my death for the rest of
their lives. Than they will realize that I was important to them. God will
punish them for my death”.
So we see unforgiveness opens the door to your soul for evil
spirits of revenge, self-judgment, suicide,
the spirits which will masquerade under psychological problems, problems
in relationships with other people and with yourself. Our judgment leads to the destruction of ourselves and
others, His judgment leads to the truth.
Every victim of abuse in order to find the way to the
happiness in relationship with other people, to clear conciseness
has to stop cursing him/herself and others, forgive others and seek help
in the body of Christ.
Jesus knew what that means to be abused, to be rejected and
hated, but He said: “Love
your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate
you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
That you may be the children of Our Father which is in heaven: for he makes His
sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and
unjust. For if you love them which love you, what reward have you? do not even
the tax collectors the same?” (Mat.5:44-46)
Love, bless, do good and pray these are key words of
forgiveness. The first steps to forgive people can be not judging of others and
themselves but understanding their actions by justifying them.
A victim of unforgiving spirit needs to realize how the
unforgiveness is destroying his/her life and lives of those who are around.
Unforgiveness is greatest sin which lead to hell on earth and tortures after
death.
Jesus –God was crucified by dirty men and He had plead: “Father,
forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing!” , He forgave
those who had nailed His hands, who cursed Him and spited on Him.
God the Father – Creator of all – The Highest One in the
universe – let His only Son to be tortured by the hands of the dirtiest of His
creation. And He forgave them. He forgave them all who forgave others and with
sincere heart asked God for
forgiveness.
We also have to bless our enemies, do good for them, pray for
them and wish good for them. So we would be worthy of His forgiveness, and His
gift of the eternal life by the promise and in the name of Jesus. Amen.